The Idiot survived a 1,059-mile summer road trip from Redding, California, to Durango, Colorado, following back surgery last month by adhering to ten key rules.
Rule One – Stop every ninety minutes and walk for one mile while lifting five pound weights.
Most rest areas, like this one southeast of Mount Lassen in Northern California, have short trail networks for Idiots who insist on taking a road trip despite recent back surgery.
Rule Two – If you’re tired after too much driving or exercise, don’t hesitate to take a nap.
The Idiot took a quick nap after exercising at the rest area southeast of Mount Lassen between Redding, CA, and Reno, NV.
Rule Three – Don’t buy energy drinks or use maps just because you’ve entered Nevada.
Though they’re good for a photo op, The Idiot doesn’t encourage the use of energy drinks or old school maps.
Rule Four – Follow one long and lonely road through Nevada to Utah to avoid energy drinks, road maps and getting lost.
The easiest way to avoid energy drinks, maps and getting lost is to follow “The Loneliest Road in America” across Nevada and through Utah.
Rule Five – Although the jail food’s decent enough, try not to get arrested in Ely, Nevada.
Getting arrested definitely hampers road trip progress.
Rule Six – There are very few road signs on Highway 50 through Nevada to Utah. Don’t ignore the ones you see.
And don’t ignore the sign behind the sign at the Nevada/Utah border that says “Next Services 83 Miles.”
Rule Seven – Don’t worry about finding iconic tourist attractions in Utah.
Not even The Idiot missed “Hole In The Rock” in southeast Utah.
Rule Eight – Don’t go off the main road.
As inviting as this side trip looks, try not to wander off the main road.
Rule Nine – Have a neck pillow to use after you’ve gone 1,000 miles and enter Colorado.
Neck pillows can be a comfort after the first 1,000 miles of any road trip.
Rule Ten – Find a bar named after yourself so you’ll feel at home when you get to Durango, CO.
The Idiot didn’t bother to unpack or shower before arranging a promotional event for “The Idiot and the Odyssey” books at Joel’s Bar within minutes of his arrival in Durango, Colorado.
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